THREE GRUMPY GNOMES

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Are you sitting quietly children, then i’ll begin.

Once upon a time, there were three grumpy gnomes known by the colour of their jackets. Mr Green, Mr Yellow and My Cyan (he had to be different).

They hung about all day at the bottom of Uncle Chuffa’s garden, greeting everyone as they came to visit.

Happy New Year, Mr Cyan cried. And a Happy New Year to you too, you old scroat, Mr Green and Mr Yellow replied. Whats wrong with you two old gits, Mr Cyan said. Whats wrong with us, Mr Yellow yelled, whats wrong with us. All night you kept running to the loo, leaving me hanging here for dear life. When a Gnomes got to go, a Gnomes got to go, was his reply. Not where I’m standing you dont, said Mr Green. All this room in the garden and you pick the back of me. Oh stop moaning, it was mega freezing last night and you would not have wanted to wander far.

Anyway, its not easy trying to balance you on my shoulders Mr Yellow you fat loaf. And you Mr Green, while we are at it, is that your right hand on my buttock, if not, why have you got a smile on your face.

Mr Yellow said, right then, the next time i go to the loo, I’m not getting down, i will just stand here on your shoulders and go. Mr Cyan replied, you do that and i will throw you into one of Popeye’s doo doo’s.

Ok ok, Mr Green said, enough is enough, Lets not fight amongst each other, its not grown down at all and Uncle Chuffa will not be pleased, lets say sorry and shake hands.

So the three grumpy gnomes shook hands and wished each other again, a Happy New Year.

Mr Cyan’s last words to Mr Green were, “Why did you shake with your left hand”. THE END

MORE ADVENTURES TO FOLLOW

• 2 Jan, 2010
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