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I was pleased my Denis Norden piece created interest.


Having returned his biography to the library I have now
delved into the Top Gear Man’s thinking, attempting to relate it to gardening.
For the benefit of our friend in Czechoslovakia and all stations east this is a comedy programme based on the most dull subject on the planet – cars.
Clarksonian type comments on our beloved plants would be interesting, as we wait for the spring as actually Sandra is the only one doing any work, beavering away in her heated polytunnel. What a woman !
This is not strictly true, because hundreds of similar unsung heroes are preparing their show gardens for Chelsea, all over the country. Lugging huge rocks about, fixing up waterfalls, potting up every kind of plant they need to suit their carefully drawn diagrams.
We all tend to take them for granted, sitting back in our armchairs after May 20th ready to enjoy before planting out the Runner Beans when the frosts have gone.
The only Clarksonian I can think of is why are Root Pots
called Flower Pots ? Who puts flowers in them ? And Plant Saucers ? Nobody keeps plants in them.
And the long tubs = Planters ? I never saw them doing any planting.

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I don't know why but the two ronnies forkandoos came to mind!
Not at all what you're thinking of but still makes me giggle ?

24 Jan, 2015


Why is it a cold frame when it keeps plants warm?
Or potting on, when you actually put the compost and plant IN the pot?

On a slightly different note, Bob Brown, the owner of Cotswold Garden Flowers puts jokes at the bottom of some of the pages in his catalogue. Things like:
"I'm a magician. I can turn perennials into annuals."

24 Jan, 2015


Thats a good one Andrew. Will look for Cotswold Garden Flowers. Have given up on Jeremy Clarkson, which is the great joy of public libraries - he can be taken back !

25 Jan, 2015


Andrew I love Bobs humour.......a great catalogue.

25 Jan, 2015


Just got my order in to Bob for this year.

25 Jan, 2015


I dare not, although I did have a quick look, unfortunately we need two new bedroom windows, how boring is that? so flipping expensive too!

26 Jan, 2015


Just as well I ordered for two then :-)

26 Jan, 2015


I had missed this one Diane but had to comment as its given me a chuckle and food for thought, lol.....

7 Apr, 2015

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