DODGY MESS . ON MY PIC ,NOW ITS DELEATED

Yes, lots of us got these yesterday. All gone now, taken off the site.

Didnt see it Crissie, but glad its gone!! x

OMG I THORT IT JUST ME ... WELL THANK GOD IT'S GONE NOW ... I WILL DELEAT MY COMENT TO HER NOW .

Oh dear its my age I read it as doggy mess...........

That would have been preferable to see,Hywel..LOl...think most of us got one... I got two,Cristina..some people have all the luck :o)

Pam so did I, but thought I had better not mention it LOL..

Same here, Pam! Are we all over the hill, or is it something in the water? And I've only just got new glasses, too!

LOL Pam & Gatt.

water on the brain
with last night torrential rain
....again....

SOOOOOO U ALL HAD MES FROM THIS WOMAN THEN .... OOOOOO LOL

Not me, glad to say Crissie! Lol
Just laughing at dodgy(doggy) poo! Lol

but not dog poo......

LOL ... WELL SHE WAS SAYING A LOT OF POO HAHA

True Cristina Lol......

She and I are engaged now;-)

Just bought a hat,Ba..:o)...maybe a bit premature,and unnecessary, if the wedding is in Rwanda ..a bit too hot for hats,I should imagine !

Oooo LOL well I do wedding hair hehe .... Just ring me wen u off LOL

You not coming Cristina....Ba And Bloomer in their finery would bea sight to behold..... ;0)

Cristina...ok you can do my hair...I expect you all to turn up....and bring me presents:-))

You will need suncream,Ba..would that do as a gift ? please let me know what factor..and don't say X...there isn't one !:o)

You need some of Karenf's elixir from the jaccussi.......factor 150 and keeps pests away..........

...and the blushing bride as well...I'm not giving her away ! Lol.

We could leave her in the jaccussi........

With or without Slove, the woman of her dreams ? .......

With of course...I don't think your taking my nuptials seriously enough>:-(

erm..have you seen what the Jacussi is filled with Ba? ..I know you don't see all the blogs ;o)) You may wish to reconsider..!

Have you any idea what I have just been through? I have had to wade through miles of drunken rambling to find references to Kf's jacuzzi! I found National anthems and other patriotic songs ( no mention I notice of the Scouse National Anthem, but we're always left out) recipes for alcoholic drinks (buy some and stick some fruit in) and other drivel. I think I've discovered the GOY Insomniac Group (GIG) am I right? or possibly Goy Alcoholics? (GA) so good I say it twice Ga Ga? All this to find out what wonderful surprise you have in store for my fiance and myself....now I know and you will be sad to hear I am looking elsewhere for bridesmaids! >:-[ (angry face)

OH MY ... BUT U STILL NOT SAID WOTS IN JACUZI LOL ....

It all started when pimpernel fell in the septic tank Cristina.....
I,ll try to find the title of the blog/blogs.....it spread about a bit.......

Right Cristina put Karenfrance into tne searchbox top right, choose her profile then her blogs, start with 'taking the lid off the septic tank' then probably tne one about food, and then the one starting Liberte fraternete......

After you,ve recovered from exhaustion, sensory overload etc.
you will I think be drunk on the fumes and ready as..... Ba well knows.....for the men in white coats!

Ha...I read doggy mess as well...and that was even with your clue Pam. Doh!

LOL! :D

I took the shortcut...through the septic tank...!

...but, I think you'll find the sheep-dip jaccuzzi on Jane21's terrace...or somewhere around there...

Perhaps Slove's already found it?? Lol! :DD

I know Pim.......what are wee like......

BA - so glad you put the explanation of your smiley beside it. I'd have sworn it was a carrot with dyspepsia.
(That's me off the bridesmaid list then, too, I expect?) :o(

The lot of you are off! I'm going to look for more sympathetic types, I refuse to let you spoil my nuptials....Carrot indeed!!! They were my eyebrows in angry frown...they still are!!!! >:-[

Oooer! Scary lady warning!

A smile is a frown upsidedown. :->

And...smiling gives you fewer wrinkles than frowning ;)

And if Bornagain stands on her head she could kill two birds with one stone - Hey presto she's smiling and gravity will erase the wrinkles, too!

Guess which birds I'd be aiming at? A young sprog like me...on the eve of her wedding....love in her heart..has NO wrinkles....you're just jealous she's chosen me! I'm just off to meet her at the airport. I do hope I've sent her enough to cover her expenses and those of her large, wonderful family. You'll all be laughing the other side of your faces when I put our wedding pics on here Ha! :-))))))) (no frown, thinking only of my beloved) :-))

Aaww! Sorry, Bornagain. Didn't mean to spoil your day. You look gorgeous from here (mind you, it's an awful long way away) and not a single carrot caught up in your veil!

Hahaha LOL ..... A lot yr all creazy. But then u need to be LOL ... Carots ermmmm ... Send one to stove ... She can either eat it or make stew for the wedding feast ... Or keep it as a keepsake LOL omg ... Wot am I chanting on bt !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_!!! ;/)

If you can't beat 'm join 'm Cristina......

O well .. grandaughter calls me crazy manna anyway LOL

Erm...did anyone get her/him a visa???
Sorry to be thinking about practicalities at such a joyous time...but, getting out of West Africa can be tricky, you know...

I doubt they'd get Visa but how about Amex......

Bundles of cash only, I'm afraid Pam...I'll post a photo of what we're talking about...
But, we could have a whip-round!!!

I 'm not sure that we should encourage Ba, she and some pals had to spend time last year in the Goy home for the totally confused.....mind you we had a brilliant time or so they tell me........

I can just imagine, Pam...
...but the money's all arranged!! Just posted it! lol! x

Oh well I,m sure that they will be happy......

She wasn't at the airport:-( She'll probably send all the money back....she's that sort of girl...Oh well...it just wasn't to be:-( I hope she wasn't put off by all your nasty remarks on here....I'll sue! ha!:-)

Sorry BA we Married at Frankpffrt...

I would like to thank you all for the wonderfull gifts...Cristina, you can put up all the banting you like, I still noticed they were egg and cress sanwiches left over from the Jubilee Party...Slove says you're not invited to her next doo !!

I am obviously far too old to get propositioned, because she never sent me a pm.........really miffed now!!

Welll ... I don't want to go to her next do LOL ... Not after she let poor ba down and ran off with pimp.... LOL ... D.d you wud only had to have all the relations over in your Gawjuss garden ... They wud have to sleep on ur famous bench .. the 1 reserved for u know who ... Stove don't match up to him anyway LOL ... Pimp how cud u marry ... Ba ,s love match ... She's never gone frown again {:+

LOL.....

My congrats Pim.....just hope you're not in the shOt again.......

Pims, does Lil know about this? She'll be heartbroken!

It was Lil's idea!

She's the 'brains' behind the whole scam. We were hoping to clean up big time with this one, but we seriously over estimated GoY generosity. A gardening site and no one helped with the flowers not even a bouquet for poor Slove..it all costs you know.. By the time Lil got her 30% there was only enough left for a Subway sandwich... Which Slove thought was a mock wedding buffet and ate it all !!! Never seen an egg and cress disappear so fast.

OMG! So Lil was in on it? I don't believe it! I shall immediately withdraw my 7 lucky lottery numbers I sent her. On past form, she was never going to share it like wot she promised anyway! :o((((

I can't believe your perfidy Pimp...on the Eve of my wedding too ... you .... you.... Pimple! A horrible suppurating one at that! I hope the name sticks:-))

What..."suppurating" ...nah, it'll never catch on !

8~p

And there was I thinking that our Lost in Somerset Blog was mad enough, and the fate of poor Tom Duck on Ba's, and yet more madness has invaded GOY, and delightfully so..Ba, my commiserations on your lost love, Pimp, you gad you! Cris, you lost out on a bridal hairdo, and I wonder where my invitation went as well? Utter delightful madness and the reason why GOY is as popular as it is..\0/xxx

Haha LOL flori ... Don't think pump will ever get over the new name .... Poor ba !! Jillted at the alter and all of us in best bib an tucker ...don't forget pride goes b... Foe a fall into the cess pit ......
And all the dosh I cud have made traverling to rowander LOL ...
Arowandering we go. LOL ..........

Ahh Tom Duck......was it Bloomer who ate him I can't remember.......
And Ba was there somewhere with a big hat?

Hi Flori..sorry you didn't get an invite,but you know how that Ba likes to keep things to herself...you could have been a rival for her affections...I think she had a narrow escape there,,Slove is probably..you know...Ambidextrous !! shhh,don't tell Pimms,or Pimple,or even Pump...so many aliases ,hasn't he ? I think he deserves that 'person '..it will all end in tears,mark my words ! :o))..and Pam,I don't think it was me that ate Tom Duck...someone's daughter,I believe?

Falling about here...Cristina has wrought my revenge...how are you today Pump ? ha ha ha ha ha Can't stop laughing ...even better than suppurating...oh my aching sides:-))) Pump Pump Pump..love it...thanks Cristina:-)
Hello Flori me dear\0/ good to have a little sympathy my dear friend:-)
Pam how short your memory is...it was Toms mother who wore the big hat, bravely keeping up appearances:-(
Bloomer, I can vouch for you in the Tom Duck dept...the culprit was my evil daughter

Same here,..still lolol..ing ! I knew it was your daughter,Ba,but didn't like to remind you..:o) Didn't remember the big hat though ...

How quickly those we have lost are forgotten:-(

But he gave a lot of pleasure while he was with us,Ba..:o)

I am not encouraging 'Pump' You have a evil Daughter ?

Yes I do...and I like calling you Pump:-)

Bloomer he did...what do Johnny come latelys like Pump know of all the tradgedies we have survived on Goy? nothing! That's what:-)

We went where all men fear to tread ! Lol...think it's time I went to bed ,before I dig another big hole...if sleep is forthcoming..just been outside..and it's still 18 degrees,at 11pm !

O my aching sides LOL .. tears tuning down my face from lafing LOL LOL LOL ..... ;+p. Pmsl !!!!!!!ment to say pump .. but pump def funny .... Omg :.........have to go bed .. b lafing all nite hehehe .........
Fear to tread ..... Stick together girls who know wot can happen LOL

" We went where all men fear to tread !" Bloomer

I SNORKLED IN 5FT OF SH0T WITHOUT A SNORKLE!!!

You think BA's little asides bother me.??

THINK AGAIN

When you say 'we', you're not including me in this whole mess yet again are you Pimp???
When you filled everyone in on my plan to clean up.....you misunderstood me.....I meant cleaning you up of the shot storm you had gotten yourself into, but my oh my....I do like it when you yell!
;)))

Touche,Pimms.:o)) Nothing worse than being in the shot without a paddle..or a Snorkel...Ba hasn't even got started yet.....a woman scorned,an all that !...Lol.

Pump, I'm glad you think my asides look little on this...hope your new wife isn't jealous:-)

You had a lucky escape Ba... I know------ I know -----it was good while it lasted but one tomato doesn't make a summer and this year I can't even boast one.....

O my .... Don't toms grow well in muck LOL ... Soz pump ... This HTC writes wot it wants , so pump it is then ....er pump , ba next time !!!!!!! X

Pump won't be liking your little asides either Cristina lol:-)

This thread is descending to the lowest depths....just remember BAh Slove has your Visa card details....I know there was no money on it before, but your pension gets paid in sooner or later... :D

Well, it's taken me half an hour to read all this getting to the part of Pimps new name Pump!....lol. Never laughed so hard in my young life, notice I said young (didn't get propositioned either, or is it inquisitioned?? Still rolling around on the floor, ooh, don't tell Pumps new bride Shove that!! C'mon Ba, time to trot back to the home for the seriously deluded, I'm missing you, let's tell Pumps and Shove to shove off........:))

Ok Janey...will Rolfie be there? I don't need all this crowing from Pump...I wish them both well...they deserve each other. A little r&r at our old home is just what I need...Flori's back now too so it would be just like good old days. We can have all those midnight feasts again...Oh I can't wait. Pump, what's a Visa card? All this new fangled stuff is beyond me:-)

Yes it will be like St. Trinians again......lights out at 8:30' midnight feasts later.....Rolfie will be getting the welcome party organised, just mind his tubes of paint as your come in. Visa card....why that's what I'll be using to unlock the security doors.........

Ok.. I have all your teeth.. cept yours BA ..Gawd, I hate posting sheltered accomadation.

Omg .. teeth LOL omg pmsl lolololo. We cab count teeth instead of dosh .... Wonder if stove has all hers ... She might get a shock LOL ...does she really know wot she's let herself in for ....Oooo midnight feast,,,,,,, erhh but you,ll need ur teth ........ Won't you !!!!!!!!

Rolfie wants to know if you still have that negligee Janey, and is now warbling 'Stairway to Heaven', and is still tying his kangaroo down...Ozzie bondage just not what it was nowadays..lol. Sorry, Pump, Pomp, Pimp..Some of my lot have wandered in from getting Lost In Somerset and the Home for the Bewildered..Surprised Yorkie and the Moonies haven't posted too..Oh Crissie..what have you started???? LOL...Hold on Ba..we are coming to rescue you....\0/x

I knew you wouldn't let me down Flori\0/ ....LIS/SISters united will never be defeated...Watch out Pump!
Janey, won't it be great...all together again:-) ...I hope Rolfie will be gentle with me...don't let him get at the pill trolley again will you:-0 ...he'll help me get over my disappointment and Pump's treachery:-)

Would I ever let you down mate???? Rolfie will be delighted to see us all again Ba, and we'll make sure that he is kept in a secure unit this time. You know how you love to play on his Didgeridoo if you can get enough puff to get a tune out of it..It always puts a sparkle back in your glass eye, and it will help aid your broken heart from Pump's treachery of stealing away your true love from under your very proboscis..I see that Ambi-dextrous could be joining us too...lol, it will be like old times..Actually if you add all our ages up together, the accumulative amount would be like very, very, very old times..tee hee hee..\0/x

How true Flori...Ambi-dextrous? Is Pump ambidextrous? I've heard rumours...... If it's Pump...don't let him in. Once I've put myself together and packed my case I'll be with you all...shan't be a tick:-) Ps I see Pump's very quiet ha! SISter power:-)

well I have just caught up with this lot on here, I can't believe bornagain thought she was going to have her way/marriage with Stove, if you rememberI was the first one in there with Stove, bornagain, you went to the wrong airport, I met her at leeds bradford airport,she is rather gorgeous, sorry all your dreams went out of the window, you know me, I always win and get my own way, better luck next time me ole love,by the way, if you do find some one to marry then please give me the pleasure of giving you away, I would say, here, she's all yours. take her with my blessings,

Just when I think I am on top of things another one of you pop up...and of course you again Bah..are you implying I bat for Yorkshire btw.. Not you Yorkshire, that bitter carrot featured Pestilence above you is simply a sore loser.

you'll never be on top of things with BA Pimp. I gave up with her long ago,

A few hundred miles later......

Run away to heaven.......

I,m with you Ba you should sue for breach of promise we have laws for that aw aye aw aye.noo

Thanks Pam my LIS/SISter...I might have known the Moonie would be a rival. Now Yorkie and Pump will have to fight over her..I wash my hands of the lot of 'em! Bitter carrot featured pestilence is it Pump? .... well at least I smell nice:-} We LIS/SISters are going to our haven and shutting the door on the lot of you...Rolfie...we're coming...what gorgeous legs you have...better that Ralphies, so there Yorkie:-p

lol...you lot are brilliant and nuts in equal measure. I did get a message from the lovely African lady, but Annie stepped in and made it clear I was already spoken for...she really did! So I'm sorted.....didn't even want a dowry or anything....true love!

Reporting from the Home of the Yorkshire Seriously Bewildered........are ye coming or not? There is to be an extraveg....extravag.....whose teeth are these anyway?.....extra vaganza tonight, Rolfie has organised everyfing, there'll be Jake the Peg, Two Little Boys and a Kangaroo that's been tied down (gawd knows why??)
After lights out, we're to meet in the secure unit where Jake has jammed the door open with his peg, Rolfie has already laid out paper and paints, we are to paint Stove or Shove, and everyone she has taken a fancy to, Two Little boys will pick the perfect match and Rolfie has promised to play Sunrise at the reception............yes nurse, I know it's time for my pills.....no I'm feeling fine...........

Where are ye all dis. mornin......Some liitl devils stolen suummerr
I tink dat Yorkies secret wepons a weather machine...where did I pack me longjohns......

I'm here...it was a long tiring flight..B.A.Travel has a little glitch and instead of 'End' taking me to my journeys end...I kept finding myself in NumLock! What a place...don't even ask:-(
So lovely to see the old gang again, Karen are you joining us? You coming Bloomer?:-))))

To enlighten those who know nothing of our wonderful other life, I've put the 'GOY HOME FOR THE BEWILDERED' poem here. Yes even the sensible Barbara...she was the start of it! If I remember rightly the magic carpet was Janeys, all other madness was collective:-)

BY THE BADGER SETTS OF SORROW
PAST THE MORRISONS SUPERMARKET
STANDS THE COTTAGE OF SPRITZHENRY
HONOURING TWO DOGS SPRITZ, HENRY
AND HER GARDEN FILLED WITH WONDERS
RARE AND LOVELY SHRUBS AND FLOWERS
TENDED BY THE HAND OF BARBARA
PRINKED AND PRETTIFIED FOR HOURS.

CAME WITH CAMERA FLORIBUNDA
NAMED FOR ROSES, FLORIBUNDA
STARTED SOMETHING WIERD AND MAGIC
FLIGHTS OF FANCY, WORDS OF MADNESS
BLOSSOMED LIKE THE LOVELY FLOWERS
PRINKED AND PRETTIFIED FOR HOURS

GARDEN LOVERS, MAD AS HATTERS
SIMPLY SPOKE OF GARDEN MATTERS,
NO-ONE NOTICED, NO-ONE FLAGGED US
WHEN WE TOOK OUR FLIGHTS OF FANCY
WHO COULD TAKE THE TIME TO READ US
WHO COULD FIND OUR FLOWER CARPET
FLYING, MAGIC, FILLED WITH FLOWERS
PRINKED AND PRETTIFIED FOR HOURS

SPECIAL HOME FOR GAGA GARD'NERS
NURSES TO LOOK AFTER THEM
GAVE MEDICATION SOOTHING CALMING
KEPT THEM SAFE FROM GENTLEMEN
THEN ROLFIE RAMPANT, WARBLING, BLINDLY
TYING DOWN HIS DOWN HIS KANGAROO
ROAMED THE CORRIDORS FOR HOURS
SEARCHING FOR THE TENDER FLOWERS
OF GARD'NING LADIES HE COULD WOO

WHEN WE'RE OLD AND IN OUR DOTAGE
WE'LL REMEMBER BARBARA'S COTTAGE
THINK HOW ALL THE WORDS OF MADNESS
KEPT US ENTERTAINED FOR HOURS
LAUGHTER BLOSSOMED LIKE THE FLOWERS
PRINKED AND PRETTIFIED FOR HOURS

Awwww......such a pretty poem BA....I will be there at the extravaganza! :D

BRILL BRILL BRILL!! Fantastic Ba, one to be remembered this, just look what Stoves missed out on a poet and she didn't know it.......brought tears to me eyes....:))))

lol..yes Janie, poor 'Slove' has no idea what she has inspired!

Ha ha Karen, Stove, Shove, Slove......poor Cristina having these filling up her comments!!

...I know, poor Cristina will be flagging us all soon! ;) Hi Cristina!! :D

Great,Ba..love it :o)..Couldn't have put it better..and we won't get flagged..it does have a gardening theme....loosely ! ..and whadda you mean..am I coming ?? I never left !! Looks like our home has acquired two new members with Cristina and Karen..my padded cell is full..any room in yours Ba ? and no ,I don't think I really want to know who else is sharing !!....that 'slove' has got so many names ..I'm beginning to think she will have lots of 'genuine' passports by now..Someone will be shoving Slove in the stove shortly..I feel it in my waters :o)

As long as its not up the chimney........ That belongs to our Annie.....

I had forgotten about Annie up the chimney,Pam..think I need to recap on blogs...or do I ? I am thinking ...will I need to increase medication ,if I do ? ...still thinking.....

Hahaha this just gets Ginoee and Ginoee LOL ... Love the poem .. fab ... I Gina need tabs soon after reading all this ... Def need a sreach in the rehab LOL ... Maybe flori can turn all this into a best seller hehe wot ur all think .. come on flori .....

Good idea Cristina...I think we've seen off Pump with our monstrous regiment of women lol. Who's Gina?

Now what we need SISters is a poem from Flori yoo hoo Flori \0/ if we get her to write poems on here, we'll keep her away from the Wikinuts...bet they'd like NumLock. Well my dear girls...what shall we have tonight for our midnight feast...I suppose Karen will bring her signature dish... Malteasers Janey whatever you do...bring your pills, maybe something Spanish from you?...I'm making a Shirley Tulip plum cake...Cristina? Bloomer? Flori? Now Pam, I know what a good cook you are..what's it to be? Not sure whether to let that Yorkie in after what she said about giving me away...but I'm not one to bear a grudge...especially if you can cook Yorkshire pudding Yorkie. Ooooh I can't wait 'til tonight, so excited. Always fancied boarding school, the sort I read about in books and comics:-)

I didn't make it but I,ve got some millionaires shortbread or being as I'm north of the border how about some traditional porage.....with Galloway cream and a tot of Bladnoch whisky......what a way to start the feast.......

Oooh porridge for me with all the trimmings...sounds fantastic:-)))

I can't believe I have not stopped following yet !!!

Sloves eyes just popped out of her head when she saw Pam's "Millionaires shortbread." Can you not make room for Slove...Could be a bonding thang for you all ?

Got the Maltesers....got on the road....ate the maltesers....sick in a layby....just past the Forth Bridge......came home....sorry, feel I have let you all down, but then again, Flori is sure to be able to make something of it....good poetry material. (if you are Pam Ayres!)

Hmm bonding thangs I,ll have to ask Ba about that one.......

Isn't a bonding thang an item of underwear? You know, one of the kind that people use that like leather and handcuffs?

Ba loves Bonda..... <<<< Stopped myself ;)

That would be a bonding Thong Karen...Like you used to sing it the guides..

you..should have left the a off Bonda,Pimms . ..could interperet it lots of ways then...Basildon,James,Brooke,premium..etc etc.somehow I don't think you had that in mind..but Ba might ! :o)

I never thang any bonding thongs at the guides....and my thpeech impediment is completely cured thank you!

I think I know what book you've all been reading! God help poor Ralphie...it will be you lot tying his kangaroo down:-) Karen, it's not a speech impediment...take those malteasers out of your cheeks immediately!....now there's a line for Pump:-)

Oh no,Ba ! you are a terror,my girl ! :o))

Hello Bloome\0/ we could do with one of Annellas Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees:-) I like being called a girl..that Yorkie calls me lady...but it means she's annoyed with me:-)

Ooimnotcheetinmaltchezherz (chokes)

Spit it out quick,Karen.what,its already melted ? no,don't bother ! :o))

Oh....oh no, no, it's ok, the dog got it....she likes a semi digested malteser.

Thank goodness for that,Karen..I just hate waste ! :o)

lol....I can't answer that! :D

ha ha,Karen...:o)

:)

Why can't you two be sensible like me?:-)

We are doing our best to come down to your level,Ba but we will try to do better..! Lol..and wheeeeeeeeeeeee to you too :o) To be fair there isn't a lot you can say about a semi digested Malteser..other than wots already been said ..end of ....Lol.

lol....true....true!

Do you think i've got nothing better to do than make inane comments on here Bloomer? I could go and watch the footie if I wanted:-)

lol.....lol.....

I do have to go now Karen and do a little work:-( I've also been looking at Plantagogo..I've got heucheras going roundand round in my head....there's just too many of them:-)

P.......m..........s......l. LOL LOL LOL hahaha .... Carnt stop lafin LOL ... Every ones Gina think we all bonkers and belong in the funny farm !!!!!!!! Hehehe the men in white Coates are comeing ta get yer LOL .....

There are Doctors in the home...Of Course Cris, Yorkshire can not administer all the meds BA needs alone.

Oh Karen, I thought we were having a meeting of the clans, and me a royal Stuart too....well....a long way down the line...:o/ C'mon braveheart, ye can't miss the frolicking because of a half melted malteaser! Just had me tea-time medication and I've made us lots a lovely juicy Spanish fare, sushi style squid....boiled tentacles of octopus....well...I think that's what they were.......mountain snails marinating in their own juice, lots of bubbles going on there, Rolfies faves, he does love a good bubble, and squeak now and again. All washed down with a good few glasses of sangre.....should that be sangria, no no, definitely sangre, the nurses gave it me earlier....:o) What's that about wheeeeeeeees? Plenty of that in here girls............

I'm ignoring Pump...I hope yorkie doesn't notice I called Rolfie..Ralphie...her OH...he of the gorgeous legs... way back after I noticed you had all been reading THAT book...possibly the most boring paint chart ever. I'll just say that a certain duplicitous man, who shall remain nameless, will not be allowed in the Home for the Terminally Bewildered whatever he says. Only Rolfie is allowed as our plaything:-)))

Oooh I'm looking forward to all that Janey...soon be midnight...and loads of sang er whatever lots to drink...anyone remember the Tenna ladies?

Where is your stamina tonight Ba ? I am watching the footie..of course.:o(...as well as responding to 'inane'? (how very dare you ) comments on here....it's going to take a strong dosage to get those Heuchera's out of her head,Pimms..you hold her down,I'll deliver the plant food ! ..not going to say where..and calm down Christina..we are already established residents of the Home for the Bewildered,as we know it....it's you ,who we will lead gently by the hand,in a reassuring patronising manner..muttering "there,there dear..everything will be just fine "..:o)..and by the way..Spain 4 Italy 0 !

Ooh, is Yorkie coming too, and bringing "legs" with her....a bit of competition might do Rolphie some good, did you say tennofyou coming Ba.....quick flick a few more whelks in the stew.

Lol Bloomer, you must be ambidextrous like Pump.......guess what?...Tetrarch's back. She's just put a comment (poem) on my last blog which I hope you've all seen:-)

Pah! I can't be bothered to spell your name. What you get up to with Rolf's extra leg is your busisness.

Hi Pumpernickle, Ba, Janey, Karen, Ambi-Dex..and poor ol Cris who's blog we have taken over with all this mad drivel..lol
As I am known as Flori-Lauri, the infamous Goy Published Poetess..I feel that I would be letting you down if I didn't use my poetic scribe to add a word or two.. Now let me see....

'Now Karen in her travels, to join this nutty bunch,
got a little peckish, as she did not stop for lunch..
Munching on Maltesers, cos they were kinda quick..
Passing by the Bridge of Fourth, she started feeling ick!
Distressed she couldn't make it, she turned and went back home..
And her lovely little doggy enjoyed a choccy covered bone!
Now Pam was making lovely bread, for a passing Millionaire,
Slove abandoned Pump alas, though he so debonair..
He thought she'd want his body, though she was after cash..
and all that he got out of it was a rather itchy rash!
Bloomer, or is that Ambi, would prefer a cup of tea..
she isn't into kinky stuff, as Pump says Ba would be..
To Karen she admitted, that she so hated waste..
and part digested 'tesers, was sure to have a certain taste..
Now Janey's into Spanish fare, don't think she's talking travel..
when not quite medicated, her mind it soon unravels..
She says that she's a Stewart..We thought that she was Jane..But since she's eating gastropods, she's classified insane!
And Ba, where did we leave her? Ah Rolfie was her playtoy,
she wouldn't read some grubby book, she's still reading Leo Tolstoy!
She's also into music, when locked in her padded cell..
The Tenna Ladies Tabernacle harmonise so well..
So there you have it folks from me, within poetic verse,
the loony cast of characters, all are quite diverse..
In the Home for the Bewildered, you will find us wandering free..
Poor Goyers all immortalised, in Flori-Lauri's Poetry!'\0/
I Thank You!!!

\0/ Hi there Flori -lauri,..absolutely spot on ,and brilliant,as usual...so glad you are still on top form..:o)
loved this..and can see you have been following all the shenanigans ...like big sister,not big brother ! :o)...We will endeavour to keep this high class thread going ,if only to give you fodder for thought ...all the rest of the inmates are still zonked out ..but I think I hear the sound of something wooden..like a leg..beaten the hell out of a door somewhere in the distance..oh no,Rolfie was inadvertantly locked up with Ba last night..they all look the same in strait jackets,don't they? .Surely the beard gave it away? I told her to take the lady shave with her..
...all the rest of the clan seem peaceful enough...wonder what was in that Millionaires shortbread,and regurgitated Malteser ? ...Very canny,these wardens.....they have ways of keeping them quiet...:o)..It won't last !

I just knew that bonding thangs was a big mistake......poor Rolfie I don't know how he coped with you all after his exertions with the Italian football team.......too much pasta again....... and no more millionaires shortbread since they were raided by the d..g squad

Flori...laureate. you have us to a T

Or have us to tea sounds much better....... :0)))

I can't believe it...I have been immortalised at last....it's what I've always deserved!! :D

Oh Flori I salute You
You're GOY Laureate par excellence
Your turn of phrase a joy to read
Though you laugh at our incontinence

The T L Tabernacle choir!
I rofl'd ... so hilarious!
Such goings on in our lovely home
Where we live the life vicarious

Last night I screamed and Rolf screamed too
Yet none came to our aids
He's read the book...and I had too
We were many different shades

Now what I need to calm my nerves
Is a darkened room and pill
Dear Rolfies antics through the night
Have made me feel quite ill

In case the same mistake is made
And I'm locked with him tonight
Just pass the mirror, I'll shave my face.
Oh..it's fifty shades of white!

And so we say eat your heart out Mr. Grey .... LOL ...!!!!!!!!!!!! Hehehe

lol Cristina, I bet you never thought your blog would turn into such madness did you? Look what you started lol:-)

Make a best seller LOL ..come on flori ,get it down on papper .......

Our Flori's now a printed poet
With verse from far and wide
But with the Moonie SiSters here
Theres nowhere she can hide.........

Another day so soggy here, no gardening for me.
and Ambi up to greet the birds, while all are packing zzeeees..
We heard the screams from Ba's room, of Rolfie wanting more..
the pounding of his wooden leg, now just splinters on the floor..
Indeed Baa's looking sheepish as if she is in trouble..
keeping Rolfie up all night, and sporting an Aussie stubble..
But Karen's chuffed to be here, as now has been advised,
that she too stands among the greats, at last immortalised!
Pam was watching footie, she's the calmest of the gang,
though concerned about Pump's bonding, thinks it's getting out of hand!
Poor Cris looks in and shakes her head, for us she's feeling sorry..
At the utter crazy nonsense, caught poetic style, by Flori! \0/xxx

Genius! :D

sorry everyone, I have to say just this, I'm B----y Speechless by the lot of you, Lol BA what you been up to spending the night with Rolphie, you naughty girl

Oh, here she comes....truth is she's just p'd off cos she didn't get any of the slug stew!

It wasn't my fault Yorkie, it was like Bloomer said..I'd forgotten to shave and they mistook me for Rolfie! :-o

I had Janey's sangria:-}

Bloomer is Rolphies good friend so don't try blaming her, and why do you need to shave I ask myself,I don't want your stubble making his skin sore, he is very delicate, Karen who made the slug stew that sounds nice,

Karen get out of here quick while you still can girl....I've not long been out of re-hab from the last time I got mixed up with them. Believe me you are better off sucking your own Maltesers. I do think it's a shame that Ba is going to shave though, don't listen to Bloomer Ba she has no fashion sense, we both know the 'Hairy biker' look is all in at the mo. It must be nearly long enough for dreads by now.
Well young Pimp, I think Pump has a manly ring to it especially now you are married so go with the flow... Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! >:-}~ Ba with neatly plaited beard xxx

Nice contribution there Annie....shall we leave now? ;)

Thank you Annella...I like it >:-}~
\0/ Yorkie.... how exasperating...you haven't read all about it you lazy thing, otherwise you'd know it was part of Janey's Spanish fare. It's all worth reading and we have poems from GOY's own Internationally reknowned poet, Flori Lauri Bunda. wheeeeeeeeeeeee:-)

Karen you can't leave now...it's a bit like Hotel California:-)

Annella...just thought...get back to work and stop wasting time!:-)

Crikey.....I had a feeling it might be like that! I've had to stop taking my meds this morning so I could join in. Oi, stop bossing my fiancee BA!

you want me to sit and read 169 comments

Yes just like Hotel California Karen..............Try to whisper so Ba can't hear us >:-}== Ba with beard after using hair straighteners x

Yeah listen to Karen BA!!!! Get reading Yorks....only took me an hour

BA has got some really effective gel going on there! It's almost a Jewish Rabbi look you've got there BA....do you have tassells?

>:-}=000 Will baubles do Karen?

>:-}@ Ba after using a diffuser on her beard

I don't think so Annie....Rabbi's don't really 'do' baubles...too Christmassy!

No Maltesers then?

I've got a hot brush BA could borrow for her beard, I can't sit here reading for an hour, I'll be asleep in no time Annella

I nearly was and I'm at work Yorks!!!!

Erm...not sure about them....did you know I used to live in Golders Green? I actually used to sing in the West Hampstead Synagogue....honestly...I'd forgotten that...it was......erm...interesting! Don't speak about the M's any more...I'm having a bad day. I almost made lemon drizzle cake earlier and then discovered

...OOOOPS!...discovered I only had low fat spread!!

Annella how come your at work, Karen what did you discover after nearly making the drizzle cake,

Thats better, no good for cake making,

sorry....it's the withdrawl from the meds...making me a bit shaky...Annie (whispering now) could you sneak down to the end of the long white corridor and jar the door open...I need to get out and get my meds...

Karens had all the maltesers Annie (shhh thats where we hide the meds......)

......explains it.....

1. Karen, which one are you engaged to?
2. Yorkie...yes I do
3. Annella, there's nowt wrong with my ears...just my brain and I like that look too
4. Tassels Karen? do you mean my ear locks?
5. you lot! stop making fun of my beard!!!
Getting tired now...you lot are mad.
Karen you could have joined us in the Tenna Lady Tabernacle Choir if we'd known you had experience. Thanks Pam...I've found them wheeeeeeeeeeeee:-)

>:-}# Ba's beard first thing in the morning \o/ Wheeeee!

That's it now..... its gone ..... didn't you see my poem? look :-) lovely and hairless:-)

Shame.....Ahh well never mind >:-})* Ba's shiny chin glinting in the sunlight (the sunlight bit was make believe as we all know)
Hang on Karen I'm coming hun........

Re Stove. just thought I would tell you I have just had a request on Skype from a bloke in alaska liking my profile and wanting to be my friend, I did put a block on it, is everyone going mad,

He could have been hairier than Ba Yorks.....we will never know now

how do they get you on skype Annella,

Never tried it Yorks so no idea

That Stove.......alaska where she's gone.....

Bloomers having trouble with the septic tank!

Well it only took me two 1hour sessions to get through this and all ive got to say is-ive got to get me some of what you guys are on lmao, i thought it was just me that stayed up all night talking absolute jibberish to people, at least im not alone! my family are in the poetry publishing business, i think ill put a good word in lol! mad'eads! :o)

You mean Bloomer's having trouble steering clear of it,Pam !...and Jane's back !! the sheep dip provider ! Hope she has got the stamina to catch up ! She will need another holiday :o)

...hmm..just thinking....Alaska...might not be a bad idea...warmer there than here I should think...and sunnier...might be worth a look. We'll all go...Janey can bring her Paella dish for all the fish heads we'll get there and if we all go in the septic spa before leaving that'll keep the Polar Bears away......yup, definitely a goer.

I'm game!:-)

Leigh, I did warn you...you can't escape now:-)

Ba..you hit the 200th comment ! Lol..you have won a prize! a weekend with Karen in an igloo,in Alaska..don't block the entrance up...she has plans for masking odours..:o)

I wouldn't admit quite so loudly that you were game Ba..someone might take a pot shot at you on Safari...The thought of your head mounted and on display..mind you, it would stop the stubble problem reappearing I suppose..lol

Hello Leigh, nice to meet you..Sorry Karen, once committed, there is no possible escape..just ask Janey..

Hi Yorkie..have you caught up on all the comments yet mate? We will be asking questions later you know...

Hi Santan..Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! phew, haven't done that in ages. It really clears the nasal passages doesn't it??

Pam, I'm confused, is Slove actually on the Stove, and is she really from Hove, or heaven only knows, apart from Onyougrows, at least I suppose, her details she'll disclose, we may be up her nose, and to the challenge rose..lol
She must be giving Pumpernickle a hard time as he has gone awful quiet...Oh isn't this fun...??? Time for our meds ladies... \0/x

No no I don't want any meds...they make my head feel funny. Talking of Pump...I don't think we'll have any more bother with him. Rolfie threatened him last night with his didgeridoo and you couldn't see Pumps heels for dust. Bloomer, what sort of gear will I need for this fantastic prize? Do we get the loan of sled dogs? is the igloo furnished with all mod cons? central heating?...ensuite?...fridge/freezer..oh probably not the latter... We'll keep a video diary...maybe get a television program out of it. 'How To Create A Garden Out of a Wilderness' Maybe get good old Alan T in on the act (Karen likes him) is one suggestion...or how about 'The Polar Bear Whisperers' It will be about how to train a polar bear to accept a rider. I'll film Karen doing that one...I don't like to hog the limelight. I'm getting really excited now....no nurse..not yet, I'll take them in a minute:-)

Groan.........I wish I'd never mentioned the bears.........get me another trannie Annie....

Morning all....up bright and earlyy up here where the sun goes to bed very late well that is if I could see it, very shy hiding behind the sea mist.. well fog really I suppose...I thought we were on the Gulf Stream!!!, it seems to have got lost anyone seen it lying around anywhere?

I've found a stream Pam, it's outside my front door. I'd be very grateful if you'd come and collect it:-)

Karen, I only know Grayson Perry and Eddie Izzard...which one do you fancy? :-)

Notice Slove never came back..........I wonder why? Infact I think we've scared them all off which is a good thing as Cris really does have a dodgy mess on here now.
If Eddie Izzards going Ba can I come? Flori just reminded me that I still have my Santanella suit which would look good around the Igloo and I could look after Karen for you (feed her Maltesers and shout encouraging words while she rides the bears) <:O}~ Me in my Santan suit x

You'll have to fight me for Eddie Izzard! It could be the end of a beautiful friendship.....but I meant a Diazepam as you very well know BA!

Poor Cristina....when will it all end?

now reached 212

I'm not in a Daize thank you very much just a bit dizzy trying to reroute the gulf stream Ba has nicked.....

I didn't nick it Pam... in fact I don't want it....too many streams...it just appeared outside my door...are you sure it's yours?:-)

NURSE yoo hoo Karen wants her medication...what? oh her diazapam....no not dizzy Pam... she's looking for her stream...now that's cleared up, what about our trannies? Karen , I asked Grayson Perry for you...... sorry:-)

Well is it nice and warm, the gulf stream is nice and warm coming from warm seas as it does.....
Where did yours come from Ba?

Oh, I don't think mine is a gulf one Pam...more of a very large puddle now I take a closer look:-(

Well can I come Ba?!!

Not if you're after Eddie Annella...you can share Grayson with Karen and think yourself lucky:-)

I'm knitting a scarf for a snowman is that weird in july......?

Yep youve definately scared me off- ive only just recently become sane myself so i feel id just be going backwards with you lot! no offence im sure your streams are all very lovely but i cant be dealing with scarfless snowmen in july! off to watch titch's new programme :-)

Ouch! snubbed again girls! Grayson Perry? Is he still alive then?

Let's ask Lily Savage...she could scare a Polar Bear away with one stare!

Don't worry Karen we have each other....Who needs cross dressers luv xx

Well I hope you lot are pleased with yourselves!!!

You scared Stove off and now young Leigh is legging it. Stop swapping your pills. You can get Bah back in the straight jacket by telling her it's a corset and Ralf will undo it with his tooth....The madness has to end!!

You got in before me with Lily Lol!

HELLO PUMP IT UP! Where have you been?!!!!!

LOl....

Dame Edna for you then my luv! :D xx

You like the name then Pimp?!! ;O]

Annella...stop flirting...the man's a bigamist...and he's ambidextrous!:-0

Three years ago when I first joined Goy I was as sane as you.....now look at me eating maltesers for breakfast withRolfie and looking forward to a mudbath in a tankini

ambidextrous is useful! I know.....get back to work Annella

Pam...I think we're the only sane ones:-) Annella...you got it:-)

/;¤)

if you're happy and you know it )( )( )( )( )( :)

That's a new face...have you had a nose job or botox Pam?

I'm lost!!!!!

Hi Gattina you have reached the happy gardeners home for the bewidered.......... nice to see you here. :0)

Phew back to normal Ba its all the rain!

Lolol!

I've just arrived...and it's raining! Can I come in? :D

You're in the right place dear....Nurse! can you show Gattina to her room please? :-)

That's better Pam:-)

Thank goodness, Karen's here....Karen, don't come through the door....see if you can sneak the keys of nurse....they've all nicked my Maltesers...need to get to the shop...and out to safety! Haaaaaaaaaaaylp!

I've been as far south on the scottish mainland that you can get and guess whats for sale in the cafe that scots delicacy malteser cake........
I thought to bring you some.......hush Karen i,ll smuggle you in a bit dear. :0)
Hi Karen nice to see you....oooh I,m confused now....

Seeing double Pam???

Hmm Annie I think I,ve overdosed on the malteser°°°°°°°ºº ¢:+))

Looks like you've overdone the bottox too......... ( :-]]

Where am I?

Cheshire Gattina................ It's not as bad it it looks, well that's what I said when I fell in the Sh.. never mind that.

Cristina is just down the road from your old Brit house.. Yes Bah........I said 'Brit house'

Yah! Pump it up is in de house!!!

hahahahaha! Just laughing out loud in the background...

Annie...you is de Queen of de Minstrels!

De garden posse is G-O-Y!!!

Yo IcePump my homie...I see yo' homie hoppers on line wiv ya. Yo PumpinAnn + PumpinKaz \0/ :-)

Yo Pumpkin Ba \O/

Well I never did, what a way to while away a few hours on a dark, grey end to the year than in a confused state with some very befuddled folk.. lol.....

Lol. Happy New Year Lincs:-))

well it took 10 min to scoll to the bottem lol .... so how long to read it all haha ,

A damn lot longer ,Cristina ! I wish all my befuddled friends,past and present ..an even more befuddled new year...and for the uninitiated ..yes,I mean you Sue..we are more than happy to have you share the padded room with us..bring your own meds..they only have enough to last till the surgery re opens...innit? .Why is Rolfie striding menacingly towards us,with his very large Hypodermic needle ???...

Hiya all Happy New Year to all of you \0/ I've just wasted an hour re-reading the whole of this ...priceless lol, laughed out loud all over again:-))))

\o/ Ba..and a very Happy New Year to you and your family too..I did exactly the same,but it wasn't a waste of time,as it made me laugh ..much needed with the awful weather yesterday.. We did have such fun :o))

Oh I needed this xxx

Its like a warm hug

Still struggling to shake off the virus that more or less cancelled christmas this year. Don't remember one like it, definitly not on my christmas list. :0(

I'm glad it cheered you up Pam..you have really had a rotten time of it..I do hope you managed a decent NewYear..xx

Thanks for asking love,
Porage, peppermint tea and rich tea biscuits......but I did have some boiled potatoes and some ham last night.....

Its the cough and lack of appetite thats taking the time to get better Bloomer, don't know where it came from......other than christmas shopping. :o(

Poor you Pam, didn't know you've been poorly. Glad you're feeling a bit better though, lots of nasty bugs around at the moment. Keep taking the laughter medicine \0/. I went to my first proper panto on Saturday at the Grand Theatre Wolverhampton. Took those of the family who wanted to go as a Christmas treat. Boo (Rebecca) laughed all the way through and wept when she saw Orville (childhood love of hers) I think she enjoyed it more than the children lol:-))

Thanks Ba, its been a shocker.......

I always suspected that the panto was for the adults.......the children like all the shouting. :0)))

Poor Pamg , its horrid being unwell at the best of times , but over "the holidays " is especially so .
If I'd known , I'd have been over to put cool hand on fevered brow !
All the best for the coming year to you and Ba .
(And to you Christina .)

Thanks Driad, and to you:-)

Happy New Year All, sunshine is top of my wishlist for us all, lol..
The blog kept me entertained for ages, I was up and down like a yoyo rereading some of the comments, hubby kept being nosey wanting to know what I was laughing at, I told him "You have to be a gardener with withdrawal syndrome to understand" lol..

All of us qualified with the meds over xmas, cold and flu remedies, plus cough mixture, I swear we were high as kites, costs a flipping fortune, we still cannot shift the coughs, our poor daughter has had it since November and spent most of her holidays in bed as she was really poorly......

Thanks Driad but it seems quite contagious...........

Sounds a similar virus Lincs, I do sympathise.......I don't know if it was the virus or the cough meds but tummy off as well.......

You want Alkaseltzer Pam, its good for all sorts of ailments and kind to the old tummy.......