it mite be worth planting a small tree or shrub as it will basicly look after itself and you will be doing the planet some good to . i myself planted a weeping willow over a river i played down as a child and walk the dogs often . its on some common land so should benefit lots of life and my ashes will help it directly . its not a strange question at all barbados .

I'd check with those responsible for the cemetery to make sure they have no regulations about what can be planted. If there are none then a small tree or shrub seems a very nice way to mark the grave. It's lovely of you to carry on the maintenance and getting to the grave as often as travel/funds permit.

NP....I like your idea of planting the weeping willow and the plan to scatter your ashes there. The tree can be enjoyed by others too.

Something low growing would probably be best, also, something that needs no regular pruning. How about some heathers with colourful leaves and a variety of flowering times, and underplant with little bulbs.

We have been to the cemetry today to prune the rose that was planted on my husbands parents grave, it had got huge over this summer and the rosehips were enourmous. We pruned it down hard, so the high winds during the winter wont rock it, in anyway. We wondered wether to dig out the rose and replace it with a slow growing shrub or maybe a small conifer, but we also noticed some graves had trees on them and conifers that had reached the heights of say 30ft and you could not see the headstone so care has to be taken when choosing. Would a row of lavender be nice? although they need some maintenance too or how about planting loads of miniture daffs, crocus, cyclamen, colchiums, hellebore and snow drops. All these would take you through the seasons. If and when you do re-plant your grave take some photos and they can be your memories for the in between months.

Lovely idea, Barbados. How about a group of three Hebes? I have one which looks like a small tree, just a foot high: very appealing - I will look up the full name tomorrow in daylight. All Hebes are evergreen, and don't require maintenance.

I thought Hebes aswell.

Or a perennial wallflower they grow to be a small shrub size and flower a long time.

Colchicums for autumn and Snowdrops and Crocus for spring. A Vinca minor could be planted in the middle that will spread out that the bulbs will push through and this will have nice flowers itself in early to mid summer.

sounds good to me but your right about asking first whistonlass .