Invasion of privacy!

There is some anti-vandal non setting sticky black paint you could use on the top of the wall. You have to put a warning notice up to comply with the law in England.
Any complaints just say its there to keep intruders out.

i understand ur problem neighbours can be a pain as i have had in the past one day i put my cd player in an area they could not see it put the iron maiden at a reasonable volume that cured the problem for quit a while i did laff

When in Rome and all that nonsense, only seems to work elsewhere as anyone coming here never has to follow our rules but expects them to be changed to suit them and their lifestyle.
if the wall is yours Gattina then Diane 's idea might work a treat, I definitely would not shut myself away, haven't you got any music that you could put on for a while, make her listen to yours for a change....

A nice line of pots and troughs along there with cacti, berberis etc.......I,d certainly have to do something!

Oh dear - poor Gattina! I would just hate that. It probably is a very British thing, but so what? I'd be tempted to try some of the above suggestions.

Very difficult for you and I would hate this. If its a cultural difference perhaps best to say nothing and find another way to deal with it!
This would be a great place for 'Pleaching' which is a hedge grown along the top of a support/trellis you can make them yourself or buy them ready done I have done a blog on this if you want to look. Trouble is although it would solve your being over looked it does not come cheap. So if the wall is yours you could screw thick trellis all along the top so that its higher than the wall and she would then not have room to perch. this would be a quick solution until prickly shrubs had time to grow through the trellis

I wouldn't like that and I don't think you are being selfish or anything. It's downright thoughtlessness :o(
I agree with Diane if the wall is yours, you could put something there to stop her using it, ... or maybe you could play some of your own music, loudly ... or light a bonfire just by the wall when she's there ...
I hope you can resolve the problem.

Must admit I'm not used to having privacy in my garden because of the way it's situated, with an access road between the house and the garden, so there are cars/bikes/people passing by regularly, but I like it because I'm used to it and it's nice to chat to passers by, it's a way of socialising while staying on my own ground.
This is different though if she's playing music, causing noise with chatting on the phone and watching you, that would make me uncomfortable.
If the wall is yours, then I like the idea of putting pots or troughs up there so she can't use it! Otherwise, some sort of trellising would be a good idea.

Hello Gattina. Your case sounds too extreme to me and I do not know how many Italians behave like this.
I come from Cyprus as you know and peoples gardens are at the front of the house and not at the rear. The rear of the house is a yard for storage. People like to sit in their front gardens even to eat their dinner. They like to watch people and be watched by them. If you know somebody you either invide him in, or he invides in himself.
Try to solve it the friendly way. Don't forget you are in their country and I am in your country.

I thought of climbing roses all along the foot of the wall - like Drc's idea but prickly! And if she likes pop music play some classical, really loudly.

Is it so wrong for me to suggest watering that part of the garden with a hose on full pelt every time she's out there ;-)
Joking aside I'm used to my garden not being very private but would take the hump at a neighbour sprawling themselves the way you describe.
Lots of great suggestions above.

dear Gattina, as I'm Italian who loves British manners,I think that girl is very maleducata !
I have a rose called _mermaid_ witch is very spinosa ,I can give you some cuts if you wish!
cactus will work good and sticky paint too!

what about asking her to move away?

Is your garden the lower one Gatt? If so how about a row of cyprus trees, those beautiful ones you see all through Italy, tall and narrow. Maybe extend that trellis all along and get some roses, clems, jasmine etc anything that will grow and spread. I would hate this situation and feel dreadful for you, do not stop indoors but become more active outside, enjoy your space, if you can. Let us know what happens. x

Oh dear what a dreadful situation you are in and what a very rude young lady she seems to be I don't think I would be able to tolerate this have you tried asking her to turn the music down a little even if you appear to be an idiot or can,t your daughter in her position as a teacher have a word with her if that fails I would do all the things that have been suggested by goy members to stop this ! Hope you find a way around this as it will only cause you unwanted stress .

Thank you everyone. There, you see, several of you have put their fingers on differing aspects of this which make it awkward. Costas, you are absolutely right - I AM in her country, and I truly don't think she realises how upsetting this behaviour is to us. As in Greece, Italians gather together in front of their houses and greet passers-by, which is a truly delightful custom, but it isn't ours, and it's not what our garden is for. There is a narrow road between our vegetable garden and other gardens, and we regularly chat to passers-by, but somehow this is different. The wall is jointly owned by us and by our neighbour, and is already 7 feet high - I'm not sure we could grow anything above the existing level. Hywel, the bonfire would be a great idea in the UK, but here, before you take a match to anything, you have to 'phone the local forestry commision officers, ask for permission and they'll tell you when and where you can have your bonfire: normally by now, there is a total ban which would last until well into September. Grandmadge, I love the idea of the tall, thin Italian cypresses but they just won't survive here - we're far too high up the mountain and the winters are far too cold. The music isn't loud, and she uses earphones - there's just this persistent thump, thump, thump. We enjoy the birds and the silence, and wouldn't even want our own choice of music to drown her out - we have other neighbours, too to think of. Dear Lia - what a lovely idea about the prickly rose, but the flowerbed below is already quite full of plants (this is a fairly old picture) and there would be no room for your Mermaid. Maybe we could train our little army of cats to walk along the wall and leave little presents: they love to sunbathe there too, but being watched by cats is not a problem!
I just find it so strange that all Italians who are so scrupulously formal and polite, and even when you have already welcomed them into to your home, always ask "Permesso?" before crossing the threshold, think that staring into someone's garden and watching their every move is regarded as perfectly acceptable. I'm sure none of them would dream of coming and peering in at your front windows.
We did consider getting the ladder out and grating a little chocolate along the top of the wall - in the current temperatures, it would soon render any stretching out a fairly messy operation, however, the cats would pick it up on their paws, too, and I don't relish the idea of its being carried into the house.
I'll keep you posted.

Sorry, I didnt realise this wall is jointly owned.
Pots of Cactus in the summer months seem to be the best idea, would not offend anyone, just somewhere to keep them as your garden is full.

I had a little idea Gattina, just start with one or two pots, then if asked you could say they looked sickly, then add others at irregular intervals, just say how nice it looked.....be "awfully british" we are often thought odd anyway. :0)

It's a very high wall to have to climb in order to water them twice a day: Hywel - have you got any spare cactus looking for a new home?

she needs (the italian lady) a greek neighbour who lives in greece not in uk :)
ee kosta?

BIK, I know exactly what you mean but don't forget
Italians and Greeks are "UNA RATSA, UNA FATSA" AND MAY BE UNA........EVERYTHING ELSE. LOL.

I have had another think about this. While its never worth up setting neighbours - you have to live along side them But!
If you thought you had some sort of animal problem on the wall!!! such as cats you could legitimately sprinkle undetectable cat pepper or dare I say itching powder along the wall. I think you would not lay there again, Once bitten etc!

Just read this Gattina and I think the best ideas are you and hubby sunbathing in the nude whilst listening to classical music and watching her itch :o))) I've spent 12 years growing shrubs and trees to make my garden private, I would hate somebody watching me out there now.

I love the idea of itching powder, you could say you thought it was ant powder........ :0)))

best of luck wiv this one luv xx

You have it Pam, put it in an ant powder container and who's to know?

I must just go and look up the Italian for "itching powder".......Actually, I've just had another idea, prompted by the words "ant powder" We get thousands of well-established ant columns and nests in the garden, and as long as they stay there, they aren't a problem, and are fascinating to watch, but maybe a thin trail of honey along the top of the wall might just encourage them to make it an ant motorway instead. No one harmed and no need to get the wrinkly bits out (Sunburn could be a minus point there). She's not here during the week, thank goodness, so I shall go and put on my sunfrock and search out that old pot of honey at the back of the kitchen cupboard....... Watch this space.

Brilliant!!

Fill ya boots ha ha

Oh Gardengadgit, FAR too hot to be wearing boots :o)

honey ! that's a great idea!
go go with honey!

I shall let you know how I get on. I got the ladder out today and got up there to have a look at the top of the wall - I hadn't realised quite how wide it was: it's going to take a lot of honey! Where's Winnie the Pooh when you need him?

Didn't he get stuck in rabbits house?.....too much honey. :0)

That's where he went wrong, you see, Pam - he ate too much of it instead of painting it on the top of walls.....:o)

Just back from a couple of days at the seaside to read this: it is a HORRIBLE problem for you Gattina . . . as you've seen, we'd all hate this, and I don't think you are over-reacting. Love the honey trail idea, and as you need loads p'raps you could pick up past-the-sell-by-date jam pots and similar from the back of the nearest supermarket?! Lots of luck with a solution :))

I do like Pooh bear. :0))

Erm, Sheila, I don't want to offend my Italian friends, but a sell-by date? We regularly find out of date stuff for sale on our local supermarket shelves. It's one of the reasons we don't tend to buy from little local shops - you get no choice and the turnover can be slow.

Going back to Pooh, when he got stuck Rabbit hung tea towels on his south end. Maybe if you use enough honey the culprit ill get stuck too and you can hang plants from her ankles....No ignore that, its getting silly

I think sugar may work good and it's less expensive then honey! Try!
Good luck!

Sillys good Stera......a giggle a day keeps the doctor away........

Silly's very good. When I go to the dentist, the staff always start off trying to make me laugh by telling me jokes in a mixture of English and Italian. By the time I get into the chair, we are all helpless with laughter. Injections, who needs injections?
I shall have a pile of tea towels, a hanging basket or two and a camera at the ready this weekend.

Keep us posted . . . we're all agog!

Really looking forward to this!

I shall be waiting with bated breath for next weeks episode, I also like Pooh, we had to as grandaughter was obsessed from a very early age, good luck with your honey trail Gattina, lol.....

Since when did passive aggressive behaviour replace straight forward honesty?

Regardless of different cultures, I myself believe honesty, gently presented of course, is the best course of action.

If you present your case in a way that she can relate to, unless language is a barrier.

The only reason I didn't speak to her at the time, Cloudy, is a) I was shocked and angry and didn't trust myself not to be rude. b) I wanted to find other people's reactions and make sure I wasn't overreacting in an cross-cultural situation. c) I should really be addressing my nice, elderly neighbour whose garden abuts mine, and who co-owns the wall, and whose guest she was, and I have a feeling it would upset and embarrass her, which I am loath to do. Language is definitely no barrier.
I very much doubt I shall do anything but seethe inwardly and quit the garden if she should repeat the behaviour. I am English, after all, and that's what we do best.

It is definitely a distressing situation, but think it would be a shame to quit your garden.

I would have a nice chat with her now that you've had time to think on the situation, and had your concerns validated.
Good luck.

You know Gattina a gazebo on that wall could do the trick, one of those popup ones, just where she lays ....then you can't see her and more to the point she can't see you........

You know, Pam, after nearly 4 years of nagging, I've finally got OH to construct a permanent base for the gazebo down the OTHER end of the garden. Our Swing seat is immediately below where she stretches out, and isn't high enough to block her out - in fact, we can't sit there when she's around, because, although she uses headphones, you can still hear her radio very clearly, and a conversation on her 'phone is as if she is sitting right next to us.
Cloudy, I am saying nothing at the moment on the grounds that our daughter, who has lived in Italy for nearly 20 years now, and is pretty much Italian herself, told us that if we did, we'd be regarded as totally mad and unreasonable - living in each others' pockets is pretty normal here, and it could make for bad feeling. We learnt the other day that our good friends - an Italian married to an Englishwoman, who have moved to a new house recently, have gone to the expense and considerable trouble of planting 75 fast-growing Leylandii plants all around the perimeter of their land. They also went to the trouble of closing and locking their gates on village bonfire night to stop an influx of total strangers coming up their drive and parking all round their house. It speaks volumes. Here, a house seems to be everyone else's castle.

But the pasta and ice cream are OK...

But they make you fat!!!!!

Just read this, Gattina , what an awful situation for you, I'm not really sure what I personally would do, sat here racking my brains, and coming up with nothing. Whatever you do, please keep us posted.

Feeling quite down about it all.

So you can hear her talking?
Then go and ask her what she wants?
"oh sorry, thought you wanted me...."
regularly until she gets fed up!

You know we haven't mentioned garden gnomes......
Ok gnomes are not my favorite people..... but!
A line of them along the wall, or any ornaments!

Surely that can't cause offence?

The best I ever saw was a whole cricket team of happy men (not gnomes) bowler, batsman, wicket keeper and as many fielders as you could afford

Could be fun looking. :0)

I know its not funny love, and I hope between us we can crack it!

Oh, you do make me laugh, Pam - you won't believe this, but many Italians (well round these parts, anyway) are absolutely mad about Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, and every other "garden" is packed with full sets of them, in glorious technicolour plaster or concrete, and are sometimes lifesize, or even bigger - much MUCH bigger! I think I'd probably crack first. Nice idea, though. Never noticed actual GNOMES, though - much classier to my way of thinking.

I,m glad it made you laugh. :0)))

I wonder why snow white?

Ah I have it your Italian lady is posing as "Sleeping Beauty"

Lol - she must talk in her sleep!

gli gnomi No!
♥

Ovviamente sei una donna di buon gusto, Lia. Preferisci la Biancaneve?

I find it quite disconcerting when you walk through the town or sit on a bus and people are talking what seems to themselves......no phone in sight.......

A woman driving a car the other day with those earbuds in, how do they concentrate?

I thought that there was a sharp increase in "people hearing their inner voices", Pam, and got out of their way as fast as I could until I realised what was happening - (Duh!) very disconcerting, especially as they seem to need to speak much louder than normal and stare into the middle distance while they are doing it.

I did the same Gattina, I crossed the road.....

We seem to have lost the heatwave here, 16c and drizzly
The west of the country is warmer I think but we are all promised thunderstorms midweek.....then back to normal I guess

dear Gattina, se proprio devo scegliere una statua metterei David B oowie!

Now I understood the last two words. :0)

Why do people talk so much louder than normal when on a cellphone, I wonder? We sometimes hear someone walking down the road apparently soliloquising very loudly before realisation dawns. The worst are on the train : "Yes.... Yes.... I'm on the train... Just approaching Formby now ..." Yaaawn!

:o) Pam - that's all you need to know!!!! (Dear Gattina, if you really want to choose a statue, choose one of David Bowie) Yes, Lia, well, all well and good, but possibly not for the garden...........
Mel - don't they have cellphone-free carriages on British trains these days?

We have a "stopping at every station ' train here, its called the Ivanhoe line (no idea why)
It started Loughborough to Leicester just two carriages, still only two but now its Lincoln to Leicester, stops at all the villages on the way that have a station, more of a halt really, just a bus shelter thing and buy your ticket from the conductor, its a very good service, with my senior rail card its under £3 return.....there is only one an hour but compared to parking charges.......
I must admit to being guilty of using the mobile though for my lift from the station..... :0)

I was joking actually!

We certainly have "Quiet" carriages on long-distance trains here Gattina . . . that's what I book when I go to see No.2 son in Cornwall, and most people respect it (though of course some people chat quite loudly!). So if I want a lift from the station I have to text :)

I know, Lia! I quite like the idea of a D Bowie statue, though - he can come and watch me weed the cabbages!

Not the local ones, Gattina! I really didn't mean to offend anyone - I would also call for a lift, so I should just shut up! Actually, the worst calls of all are the business ones.

I was sure you known!

and David can do anything!
he's the welcome, isn't he?
ah ah
how do you say magari?

I think its Montreaux in Switzerland where theres a life size statue of Freddie Mercury on the side of the lake......no idea why?

He loved it there Pam (said he found "peace for the soul" there), and Queen were inspired to call one of their albums Jazz after the Montreux Jazz Festival. Luckily it isn't out of keeping: we drove past a year or so (revisiting the village where we used to live near Lake Geneva), and couldn't even see it.

Gattina,you didn't told us if the noisy girl came again I'm the week end !

I've been thinking about you such a lot, Gattina. We can laze about outside with virtually no disturbances. I hate to imagine the unpleasantness of your situation.

We stayed in that hotel opposite the railway station(I loved the train ride up the mountain).
I seem to remember walking along with the lake on my right and he was in an open area facing the lake in his well known arm raised pose Sheila, thanks for the info I,d always wondered........

I also seem to remember that someone mentioned that the chalets we saw from the little train had strict instructions as to the flowers they could grow......was that true do you know?

Dear Gattina, mi viene in mente un libro che tratta l'argomento 'vicini invadenti' Amelie Nothomb
Le catilinarie! You must read because after that story, yours i
s just ridicolous! Don't know if I'm explained well!
Try on Abebooks

I don't the answer to your query about the flowers, Pam, but such an edict sounds very Swiss!

Thats what they said!
Can you imagine what would happen here...

looks like this could be a best seller lol

Lia, "Magari" would probably translate best as "If only------" Your parallel with Amelie Notcomb is perfect!!!! I must try finding it in translation as my Italian isn't really good enough to appreciate all the nuances.
No, my friends, the incubus didn't come this weekend. I got all worked up, trying to work out what I'd do if she did, and she probably went off to the seaside instead. Who wants to spend a hot weekend on a wall with a grumpy foreign neigbour making you feel unwelcome, after all? If she comes next weekend, she'll find a garden full of unfriendly English (and some Italian friends)we've invited to tea, too.
I must go - the mother and father of all thunderstorms is powering towards us (thank goodness) and I must go and unplug a few things. It's incredibly hot and muggy here, and we're desperate for rain. Have you got your sunshine back in the UK yet?
Oh, yes, and congratulations to you all on the new baby - we keep getting asked about "il bimbo" and it took me ages to work out what the Italians were on about The penny dropped after about 3 goes. They all seem to be ardent royalists here.

Aah, the photos and the tv news are lovely, bless him his little
hands came up just as if he was waving, I just hope the media leave them alone now, they do seem to have a good rapport with the press these days and give them a "photo op" then they get a bit of peace.....the bit that made me smile was when William put the car seat in the car then said "phew!". Not a time to struggle in front of the cameras. :0)