"Bureaucratic nonsense"

Hi there...can't think of anything that could possibly blend in better ....and I sure can't better that really...BUT..
I live in a conservation area and the trees in our gardens have all had preservation orders slapped on them - willy nilly. The Council have their offices in a converted beautiful Victorian mansion just opposite us.......
One dark and stormy night....lol...my neighbour drove home about 10pm in the lashing rain and as she turned in her avenue - a massive tree came down - just missing the bonnet of her car. Apart from shock - she was OK and next day - being a Sat - she got a local tree surgeon to do the needful and unblock her drive - oh and the pavement outside too- and he kindly removed the timber. On the Monday am - the council promptly contacted her and asked why she had not requested permission to take down the tree...eek! When she explained - they said she should have asked for "Retrospective Permission" ...DUH??
Of whom - GOD? Well it was an act of - that felled the thing.
We are all still laughing......

That is an astonishing tale. Mine was plain and simply silly, this is unbelivable, absolutely......words fail me.
If they are so hot on the 'retrospctive' surely they should have placed 'Caution. Fallen Tree' signs in the road the evening before.....perhaps she should claim negligence on their part.

I like your logic!!! The tears of laughter are running down my cheeks LOL !!!
Indeed - Maybe they thought my neighbour had ESP :>>))))

I approached the same council three years ago when I was renovating my old house here after my husband died and I wanted to put a twin-skinned perspex roof on my "sitootery" ie garden room - which had three walls already - and merely needed an "end and a door" Out of courtesy - I already knew I didn't NEED permission....I took my little scaled drawing over to the planning dept. They studied it and called me back to say that is was too big. I was taken aback - and asked by how much...(by this time it was actually complete incidentally!) to be told it would have to be 6" (YES SIX INCHES) shorter. I kept a straight face and told them I would see to it. I even emailed them a week or so later - inviting them to come over the road to inspect it....nobody ever did...TG !! Need I say more!!
Councils - who needs 'em!!!

Since when have brown & green not gone together then??!

I think your benches look great...would've been more acceptable in pink & blue tho?!

Why have trees got brown trunks and green leaves then....ask those twits that:)))

Apart from the usual lame excuses we hear for trains being late i.e. wrong leaves wrong snow etc. etc. I complained about the tree outside our house pushing up the paving slabs and it was a hazard to older people, the council came along took photo's measured up, drew white lines on the slabs and then ...... nothing, when I phoned and asked what was happening they said that all the information they had gathered was sent to the wrong department and it would take seven months to get it back!!! ... It is in the same damn building!! The person they sent must have gone via Australia. The work has been done now but it took 13 months!.

I like them.

When I moved into this house, I changed the name of it (we don't have numbers in our road). I wrote to the Council and Post Office informing them and displayed both names for three months to aid the transition.
Twenty years later, one of my neighbours was given planning permission for some work but I hadn't been informed. When I asked why, I was told they had sent the notification to the old address. I pointed out they had been sending Council tax bills to the new address - "but that's a different department"

I think you should be really proud of them and the green and brown works well together ask the Victorians.
While at my dentist last week I asked the receptionist when my daughter had last attended she looked it up on her computer and said “last October when she had a crown fitted” I asked to make her an appointment for a check up. The receptionist said I could not because of the data protection act she must make her own appointments. What logic is that?

I would say the real reason you cant make anyone's appointment for them at the dentist, is so if they forget to attend, the dentist can charge them for a missed appointment. If someone else had made their appointment they could say they didnt make the appointment in the first place and so have a valid excuse for not attending - if you get what I mean.

Oh that makes much more sense. except in 11 years with them she has never missed.

I'm just guessing - but I have a bit of a downer on my dentist at the moment - I was charged 50 pounds for my last 5 minute check-up, and am really cross with myself for not querying the charge.

Can you imagine if we all ran our lives like they try to for us?
Altzheimer, very cool, I like your response, calm in the face of darn right pointlessness.
Its scary isn't it, wrong addresses, wrong depts and months to acheive the shortest of tasks. I wonder if they would notice pink & blue Fluff?

All I can say GF - is that you have raised a great blog....what horrendous stories of mismanagement and crass stupidity .....this could run and run....I'll bet we could all add to your "Jobsworth File" As the saying goes....watch this space...LOL

Thanks A. but I hope our society is not in such bad state to have this run..isit?...ummmm, yes it is isn't.

I should say thanks to you to A. as it was your "not a good blue" that started this blog off.

It really is fascinating how blogs and photos etc get "hijacked" isn't it!!! It's what makes this GOY site such fun....but addictive! Not so much of a problem at my stage in life - as my sainted Father would have said "You got nothing to do - and all day to do it" Yes ...well - that's as maybe!!

I just posted this and its not here so am doing this again! so if it appears twice, thats the reason why.

These computers (& GoY) also keep us up late too. I'm away to my bed now right enough as I have to got to school in the morning. I took 'Daz' the adder into the lads school today for 10 minuites or so.. I was in there for nearly 1.5hours, the kids were really keen with loads of Q&A. Word travels fast as I have been asked to visit another primary in the morning before I release her again way up in the forest.
g.n

The bureaucrats and apparent idiots who make these stupid decisions, unfortunately are human beings. Something must happen to their brains when they join a large company or a council. The only sensible people are GARDENERS.!!

I work with children on my estate and we decided last year to take them to a forest (lots of our children dont get to go away on holiday and some had never been to a forest!) and after compiling 20 odd page report on health and safety, risk assessments etc was told although we are insured for pond dipping the children couldnt make dens in the forest in case they hurt themselves!! - I couldnt believe it (yes I do sound like Victor Meldrew!) to me pond dipping is a lot more dangerous than making dens with a forester! - still the children enjoyed themselves and I will never forget the sight of a little girl saying "do they really grow that big" to the trees!!

Everyone should get the chance to experience the countryside and forests. Good for you in helping these kids to do that and how silly to stop them building dens, ridiculous. Most people blame 'Europe' for all these silly rules but most are actually down to the people within these organizations (councils, forestry, parks etc) covering themselves in case they get sued.

We are going the same way as America in terms of civil action. I used to be afraid to let some of the kids around where I live into our garden to play on my kids' trampoline, in case they fell off and their parents sued me! Only some kids, mind. I know its a pretty sad way to think, but some of the parents I know would have. Also, the school where my husband used to work had to stop skiing trips abroad, because they couldnt afford the insurance, after a parent sued when her son came home with a broken arm - apparently he had gone off on his own!!

Thoroughly enjoyed reading all this but if I contribute I will start 'spitting cobs' again and my blood pressure is high enough, lol.

I have heard of this kind of thing going on Spindle, friends used to do the same thing with their play equipment but dare not these days. Its a shame.
A volunteer group (including children) were clearing out a burn in some community woodlands in Argyll that had had years of all kinds of junk cast down into it by a few residents.
Even while they were there working to clear it away a man came to the top of the bank and cast yet more in saying "I've been doing this for 'effing years an' I ain't going to effing stop now!"
At the end of the same road a guy had planted out a piece of overgrown verge ( only about 2 x 1 metres ). He knocked on a neighbours door to mention that their son was hitting off all the 'Red Hot Poker' heads. This was met with a barrage of a great many very unplesant things and he was then asked if he had got planning permmission to plant it? What chance do children have with roll models like that?
I know what you mean Wagger but PLEASE don't get yourself stressed over this........I can't afford the civil action!!! Lol

I cannot believe this happened. Those poor children!

There was a radio discussion recently about a couple who rented their kids a bouncy castle for their birthday party. Sure enough, one of the kids at the party fell off it and sustained some sort of injury and the parents sued. The outcome? Court ruled that the child had been 'unsupervised' and awarded damages. Made my blood run cold, I can tell you. I had hired a bouncy castle just a few weeks before for my own kids' party. The world has gone mad.

We seem to have nurtured a culture where we have no responsibilities regarding the care and safety of our children and ourselves. Buck passing.
As a joiner/woodworker I half expect to one day find myself up before the bench being found responsable for a drunk persons fall down some stairs.....because I had installed the stairs 20 odd years ago!!

Soooooo glad we moved here and left old Britain to tie itself up in knots with all its red tape. Happily the 'Nanny State' hasn't reached here (yet!!!) and we often have a giggle as we drive past a gang of men strimming along the side of a road. "What!!!! The road's not been closed off for a whole day?????" or seeing a roofer merrily walking over a roof and re-tiling or whatever - with not a hardhat or harness in sight - what IS Health & Safety?????; or dynamiting of a small part of mountain by a road to allow easier movement of large lorries and, once the 'bang' has finished and the resulting debris pushed aside we can all drive past and on our way - on the same day - not several days later when the last speck of dust has settled!. I also love the fact that we are allowed to have electricity points in our bathrooms. Councils - it CAN be done! We are NOT fools!

Thanks Nariz,
A need for a sensible on site evaluation of each situation is needed. Common sense.
If it's raining in the south don't make us use umbrellas in the north!

Ironically strimming is an issue that has not apparently been looked into (not in argyll at least). There is a warning in the instructions and a on the machines saying no one should stand (unprotected) within 50 metres (a totally impracticle distance) while it is in use. Our council here do strim along roadsides and footpaths without closing them off.
I've noticed this as a strimmer was once suddenly swung towards the path we were walking along (on the Isle of Mull) passing less than a metre from my ankles. I think the operator was more alarmed to find someone there than I was to have been 'buzzed'.
Please don't start closing the paths guys but please keep your eyes open!

There seems to be municiple 'belt and braces' in almost every regard but strangely casual in others.

Brilliant blog! I work in care, so the instances of the nanny state rearing its ugly head are too many to go into!
One i will tell you is that for a lot of the people I work with, the staff are their surrogate 'family', yet we are now forbidden from using terms of endearment (I do it all the time!) or from hugging them! How do you explain to the person for whom a hug is a massive breakthrough that suddenly its not allowed???????????

'Common sense'.
I think were are hoping for to much by the sound of this blog.
You are in a difficult situation. Most of the above situations commented on resulted in people (us) having a good curse or a harty laugh of disbelief but you have wee souls who are left wanting and possibly even feeling shunned. Some people sit in offices making these decisions on paper in a cold thoughtless and detached manner totally unaware of the consequences of their days work.

I've just given up my conteract (& due to a managerial c***up, it ended a month early) but on friday night I was sent (by a colleague) a video message from one of our s.u's asking me to go back, cos he misses me! It's heartbreaking! The Care Commission (joke name or what? ) dont give a toss!

There is an album track by Mike Rutherford (formerly of Genesis) called 'Waiting in Line' from the topically named 'Smallcreeps Day'. It's about a character working on a factory production line and contains the lyrics : -

"I'm patiently waiting in line
for what I don't know I don't mind",

Sums up you're tale MP as it applies to people as well as products. Blind thinking, blind actions.
Very few probably really know or care what 'comes out' the other end of their daily actions.

All real this may be but lets a few more funnies to cheer MP and myself up again!!!

When I went to school on my first day, I refused to go back, cos the teacher was a liar!
She told me "Sit there for the present" & I never got one!

LOL. How many times have I heard THAT one, Mp??

Lol, MP (I missed this one) I'd not heard that but I did hear (around 30 yrs ago) of some building site newbie tricks. My mate was an apprentice brickie in a big firm and told me of this.
He was sent to the on site store shed for a 'long weight' by his 'mentor' as the one in his kit bag was too short. He returned over an hour later empty handed after the storeman had given him his 'long wait'.
Also when cutting a softer material with a grinder (no sparks) he was told the grinder was at fault. He was sent to the store for a 'bucket of sparks'.

I think as a sixteen yr old out of school ( in the 70's, these days kids are more streetwise with all the I.T) into a tough old enviorment like that I would had fallen for them too!!!
All a part of lifes rich tapestry etc.

Yup...and in our bad old days as nurses - when we were setting up those IV fluids that hung from hooks up above patients - we would send our newest pupil-nurses (usually the Graduate ones that thought they were a bit above the rest of us...they aren't like that now I hear....ahem!) through to another ward and ask for the loan of a "long stand" Same difference!!!

I've done that to my stepmum! I also got my boss to put an order in for plastic welding rods!

Aye - it's a steep learning curve when you are a "green-horn" ...more like a flamin' Ramsay Ladder....every rung a lesson and very easy to slip up!

LOL! Good one!

Lol, good ones!
and not to mention its a long way down too Alzheimer.
Funny how we say 'slip up' or 'fall down'.
As kids we were told to 'sit up' at the table but once there we were told to 'sit down'.... but perhaps this should be for another day!'

....and another blog!!!!

Lol, I thinks so ....but maybe not just yet....after the various blogs going on recently I think my brain needs a rest for a wee while!!!!

Totally agree...it has been a bit crazy around here ...so I am off to the garden for a rest!!! After I get the Xwords finished!
Glorious morning up here and the geese have arrived!!
There will have been others no doubt but it was MY first sighting ..and always the most thrilling of course.
There - up on the hill with the dogs first thing this morning with the swallows still swooping around high up in the clear air - the haunting call of the geese - as they flew south in their hundreds...it was pure magic...and proves ...if it needs proving that the crack of dawn IS the best time of day!

Sounds gorgeous, B!

It was MP...truly uplifting...far better than going to any church!!!

Anywhere can be your church/temple/shrine/ whatever! I have always thought there is more serenity outdoors than you'll ever find in a building dedicated to 'organised religion'.

What a fine morning you had Alzheimer. I love early morn and up that hill sounds even better. Good and sunny here to today, planted out the shrubs and sapplings I've had in pots this year.
I heard the geese myself this weekend but they were just over the trees so no sighting yet.
Ummmmm.......churches, religion....thats a tricky one, so many views. I just know that being outdoors, in the hill/moutains using all my senses to experience everything around is enough for me. As you suggested MP....no buildings required.....no buildings prefered!
Have a good week!

You too,GF!