heres an interesting funny story i think and so true
By noseypotter
43 comments
A dialogue between God and St. Francis…
>
> GOD:
> Frank, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is
> going on down there on the planet? What happened to the dandelions,
> violets, milkweeds and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect
> no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil,
> withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the
> long-lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of
> songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But, all I
> see are these green rectangles.
>
> St. FRANCIS:
> It’s the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They
> started calling your flowers ‘weeds’ and went to great lengths to kill
> them and replace them with grass.
>
> GOD:
> Grass? But, it’s so boring. It’s not colorful. It doesn’t attract
> butterflies, birds and bees; only grubs and sod worms. It’s sensitive to
> temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing
> there?
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it
> green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other
> plant that crops up in the lawn.
>
> GOD:
> The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really
> fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut
> it-sometimes twice a week.
>
> GOD:
> They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.
>
> GOD:
> They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> No, Sir, just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.
>
> GOD:
> Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow.
> And, when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> Yes, Sir.
>
> GOD:
> These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on
> the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them
> a lot of work.
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> You aren’t going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing
> so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it, so they can
> continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.
>
> GOD:
> What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer
> stroke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the
> spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn, they fall
> to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and
> protect the trees and bushes. It’s a natural cycle of life.
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle.
> As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to
> have them hauled away.
>
> GOD:
> No!? What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter
> to keep the soil moist and loose?
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which
> they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the
> leaves.
>
> GOD:
> And where do they get this mulch?
>
> ST. FRANCIS:
> They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.
>
> GOD:
> Enough! I don’t want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine,
> you’re in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us
> tonight?
>
> ST. CATHERINE:
> ‘Dumb and Dumber’, Lord. It’s a story about….
>
> GOD:
> Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.
>
- 12 Jul, 2010
- 26 likes
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Comments
I love this one. lol :-)
13 Jul, 2010
Great, Nosey! It gave me a giggle but ...... oh how true! Doesn't it make us all sound soooo daft? At this point I'll just be shining my halo while I say we have no grass in our garden, and I mulch with leaves fallen from our hazelnut tree. ;o))
13 Jul, 2010
we can try but it often falls on 'deaf ears', but we gardeners do our bit--or try to ! :o)
13 Jul, 2010
NP, that's hilarious thanks for making me laugh so early in the morning, more than a grain of truth in it too!!!
13 Jul, 2010
Thats really good, and so true. Human beings are indeed strange.
13 Jul, 2010
Absolutely brilliant L.
I just wish you could put this up on a big poster where everyone in the world could see it!
13 Jul, 2010
Brilliant NP and so true,where did you find that gem?
13 Jul, 2010
hahahahahahahahaha.......I love ittttttttt....good one!
13 Jul, 2010
too true Ian !
13 Jul, 2010
LOL!!! very true, and am glad that I don't have any grass, Ha Ha! :-))
13 Jul, 2010
lmao!!!
13 Jul, 2010
i dont have grass and i do mulch with the leaves that fall in my front garden phew lol . it does put us into perspective . i remember watching a fishing programme called jungle hooks . this jeramy bloke went into the depths of the amozan basen paid a fortune to catch this arapima or one of the biggest fresh water fish on the plannet . the natives laughed there socks of when he caught it and put it back after spending all that money just to catch it .depends how you look at life realy . often worth looking at from another angle .a friend sent me this and i thaught it was so apt lol . glad you all liked it . take care bye for now .
13 Jul, 2010
hahaha lol so true but my grass is gradually going ,and we love the leaves to compost on the soil . but yes send it to gardeners world to read . xx
13 Jul, 2010
Absolutely brilliant yet again Np. Love your blogs, and this one is so true, I laughed all the way through. Made me think of the old Smash advert, when the little aliens were laughing at what we did with a potato masher.Lol. We've evolved quite well, haven't we hehehe hahaha. :o)))
13 Jul, 2010
Excellent idea Cristina. :o)))) hehehe.
13 Jul, 2010
or GQT or whats that radio 4 programme ' costing the earth'??
13 Jul, 2010
i think ill try gardeners world . put with a few pictures of yours truley or a sculpture or 2 or both should be interesting lol . i remember the mash advert .we are mad thow arnt we ?
13 Jul, 2010
Brilliant Np.....just brilliant !!
13 Jul, 2010
i just wrote a letter with this joke to gardeners world . ill let you know how it goes ok lol .
13 Jul, 2010
Brilliant Leigh, you always make me laugh !
Good luck with the competition. :0))
13 Jul, 2010
CU on Gardeners' World, then, M8!!!!! LOL!!!! :-))
13 Jul, 2010
Np that is brilliant and oh so true......
13 Jul, 2010
LOL Leigh what a funny lot we are for sure, God must be mightily miffed with us all.......we'll look out for you on GW :o)
13 Jul, 2010
do not adjust your set lol
13 Jul, 2010
lol thats brill hope u get on it then hun. dont 4 get to mention ur goy mates as well .keep us posted . xx
14 Jul, 2010
That's brilliant, Np!!!! Thanks for sharing it with us! :-)))
14 Jul, 2010
i already mentioned my goy mates first at first as it goes . your more than welcome how could i possibly keep it to myself lol .
14 Jul, 2010
What an excellent blog ..... and so true ......... and very funny......
14 Jul, 2010
lol
14 Jul, 2010
Very good! and soooooo true lol!
14 Jul, 2010
Hope it does get read on GW. Keep us posted though as to the progress. :o))
15 Jul, 2010
apserlutly i will keep you posted lindalooloo
15 Jul, 2010
Glad I got rid of my lawns Nosey and I`ve just planted two trees so I better let them drop their leaves and leave them on the ground. I haven`t stopped laughing yet.
15 Jul, 2010
no its very apt stroller lol
15 Jul, 2010
This is so funny NP, thank you so much for sharing it with us. I'm guilty on some counts but my 'lawn' isn't all grass....lots of God's dandelions, moss and weeds in it too! lol. Good luck with the competition :o))
15 Jul, 2010
we are all hypercryts lily lol this just makes it obvious lol .
15 Jul, 2010
Fabulous! Thank you for reminding us all...
16 Jul, 2010
your more than welcome izzy xx
16 Jul, 2010
I don't know whether to laugh or cry Nosey:-( :-)
16 Jul, 2010
both probably bornagain .
16 Jul, 2010
There was a program on the radio the other day about how grass and our greed for it had elbowed out the wild flowers needed by bees and others, so is part of the bee loss problem:-(
17 Jul, 2010
bloody grass its handy for when you have children or want a nice picture . i say i have know grass but i do have grass . its a little head with grass for hair . i realised bye the way my dogs were chewing up the acers in the white skullfish on one of my blogs .i soon realised they do need some grass but keep it raised if your runs small so the dogs dont wee on it.
17 Jul, 2010
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You have to laugh,but it is so true :)
12 Jul, 2010